So round 3 has started, delayed slightly by my period deciding to play games and not turning up on time. We had that passing thought that we may be “one of those couples” Villa Boy more than me, but no reality hit. Obviously only after I had stared at a negative pregnancy test first thing the day before. Is there a more depressing way to start the day? I am sure there is, but it would have to make the top 10 wouldn’t it?
It takes me a few injections to get back into the swing of things and I hate the build up to the first one. I have to admit I didn’t sleep well on Thursday night and was a little tetchy. But a deep breathe and a stern internal talking to meant it was ok, and apart from the bruise you can’t tell that I, once again have an expensive early morning drug habit !!
The first few days are a bit surreal it seems strange in some ways almost relaxing as there’s nothing I can do now but follow doctors orders. Being me I can’t do nothing that really isn’t possible! So what else do I do? I try and eat well, organic as much as possible, make sure I get my 5 a day and a large amount of protein. I also try and relax as much as possible but mostly I just try and go with the flow. I haven’t cracked open my Zita West CDs yet but they always help facilitate a better nights sleep and I am sure that I will need them to help me switch off at some point.
The fear of no eggs growing hasn’t kicked in, in some ways I am positive that we will always get something, that is very rational, I fear in a few days time I will be unable to be that rational! But I find I can’t think further than tomorrow at the moment, no thoughts on egg collection, embryo transfer or the dreaded 2 week wait. It feels pretty good and strange to be only focusing on the here and now as being infertile seems to involve a lot of thinking ahead and forward planning. I will embrace this serenity and hope that it continues.